Passion: Is the Tail Wagging the Dog?

“You’ve got to find your passion!!!!”

Oh really? Again, with that old chestnut?

If I had a dollar for every time I heard this phrase, I’d be sipping cocktails on a private island shaped like a unicorn. But alas, I’m here, still hearing it at dinner parties, in Instagram captions, and from well-meaning life coaches who sound suspiciously like motivational Siri.

Now, don’t get me wrong—passion is excellent. Fiery, fabulous, occasionally explosive. But here’s the kicker: I also hear people talking about their passion for things like personal development, the environment, dogs, cats, unicorns (who are these people, and where do they see all these unicorns?), and random obscure hobbies like beekeeping while blindfolded. And that’s fine. Sort of.

But let’s zoom out and ask: when someone says, “You’ve got to find your passion,” what does that even mean?

What If Passion Doesn’t Whistle and Wag Its Tail for You?

Let me take you back. I used to hear those magical words and think, “Bloody hell, I must’ve missed the passion bus. Maybe I blinked.” Everyone around me seemed turbo-charged, frothing enthusiastically, charging up the corporate ladder while I was still figuring out how the bloody printer worked.

Honestly, I felt like a fraud. Someone had handed out a Passion Manual at a meeting I missed, and I was left with the SparkNotes version—in French.

But here’s where things got deliciously intriguing.

The “Tail Wagging the Dog” Epiphany (Now With Extra Sass)

Long after leaving my science job—and probably just after my fifth existential crisis—I had a lightbulb moment.

Some of those so-called passionate high-flyers? Total fakes. They weren’t passionate; they were just loud. Arrogance masquerading as certainty.

But then there were others. Quiet achievers. Doing their thing. Glowing from the inside out. They weren’t trying to be passionate. They just were.

That’s when I realised I had it all arse-about.

The Moment the Penny (Finally) Dropped

There I was, at a business breakfast (those strange rituals involving soggy eggs and self-promotion), when someone asked me what I did.

I said, “I’m a psychic.”

And without skipping a beat, she said, “Ohhh, I can tell. You ooze passion.”

Cue inner fireworks. Ka-BOOM.

I went home and told my partner. Her response?

“Duh. You didn’t know that?”

Apparently not. I thought passion was something you hunted down like a truffle pig. Turns out, it was already living rent-free inside me.

Here’s the Juicy Truth:

You don’t find passion.

You don’t search for it, chase it, or stalk it on social media like a dodgy ex.

Passion finds you—often while you’re knee-deep in something completely unexpected, like cleaning out the garage or helping a mate build Ikea furniture (aka Swedish couple’s therapy).

And here’s the real kicker: the people you know who radiate passion like their bodies glitter at a music festival? They’ve always had it. It’s not new. It’s not a trend. It’s just them.

The Even Juicier Truth (Brace Yourself)

This might be a brain-bender: passion, like love, joy, and genuine belly laughs, is your natural state. You were born with it. Then life happened, you put on your “sensible adult pants,” and somewhere between paying bills and pretending to care about tax deductions, you forgot.

So, how do you get it back?

Simple.

My Naughty, No-Nonsense Passion Hack?

Forget passion entirely.

Yep. Banish the word. Throw it out with that expired hummus in the fridge. It’s overrated. And honestly, a bit needy.

Instead… go for curiosity.

Curiosity is the sexy, underrated cousin of passion. It doesn’t yell. It whispers. It nudges. It gets you poking around weird corners of the internet, talking to eccentric strangers, and signing up for goat yoga at 2 a.m.

Curiosity is that mischievous little voice that says, “Ooh, what’s this?” suddenly, three hours later, you’re deep-diving into 17th-century alchemy or bird calls of the Amazon rainforest.

Curiosity doesn't need a reason. It just is. And when you follow it? You feel more alive. You glow. And before you know it… ta-da! Passion shows up, looking fabulous and taking all the credit.

And the Grand Finale (aka The Bonus Round):

When curiosity lights your fire, it turns into excitement. Excitement leads to gratitude. And gratitude?

Well, gratitude is the gateway drug to passion.

So there you go. No searching is required. No corporate buzzwords. No faux-inspirational Instagram quotes in curly font.

Just curiosity. Just you. Just now.

Have a fabulously curious day.
Psychic Andrew Warnes, Brisbane

Have a look at our Monkey Mind blog. it'll have you jumping around in the trees. Oh, and also, slightly off subject, but here is something on Habits.